Wednesday, 29 June 2011

You're worth it

So recently I learnt, or was told, that the reason Taipei seemed to have so many lesbians was because parents encouraged it.

Don't confuse this with being supportive of being gay and then be disappointed by the lack of a gay pride parade and most of the gay community congregates in a cool but small area in Ximen (西門).

No, the real reason they support this is so that their over protected daughters can have some relationship practice

Read that how you will, but parents like their daughters to find a "girlfriend" that they hold hands with, hang out and go on "dates" with so when they get a real "boyfriend" they'll know what to do. 

I'm pretty sure it doesn't go any further than the hand holding but wow Taiwan. In a country where there are so many girls who will admit to being in a relationship for the sake of the label rather than notions of compatibility, maybe there should be less emphasis on being in a relationship. 

Women! You're allowed to vote! Your opinion and existence has the same value of any man. So why do you find it so hard to believe? 

Instead of finding a man to define who you are, why don't you first define yourself? 

Men! Those of you who are intimidated by strong women: Shame on you! 

What is society turning in to when women always have to be these submissive, helpless, damsels in distress waiting in their ivory towers for their prince charming to ride up on a white horse and save them from being a social outcast and eternal loneliness???

Girls shouldn't need to feel like they have to be in a relationship to be acceptable in society. It's ridiculous that they should reach a certain age (30!!) and be seen to have "expired".

No need to follow the white rabbit!
That's not your biological clock he's holding.
Do you believe that true happiness lies in a relationship? How many people could truthfully say no? From the moment we could hear, we are fed stories of blighted princesses who were saved from the claws of misery by a devilishly handsome hero. We are told that men are the key to happiness, they open the door and the other side is nothing but rainbows and bunny rabbits. Without them we are but at the whim of an evil step mother, an overbearing father, or these days, the critical eye of our peers.

Let's just ignore the fact that sometimes, just sometimes, we deserve more than the man we have. You know what they say; a bird in the hand is worth giving up ever finding true love and happiness. That's how the saying goes... Right?

I feel like I'm stating the obvious when I say, "You deserve better!" 
It's the old cliché isn't it? The guy obviously doesn't respect you enough, he talks down to you, expects you to do everything for him, but every now and then he'll show you a morsel of appreciation and because you're so starved of affection it feels wonderful and that'll keep you going for another year or so. 
Wake up and smell the burnt toast! 

Every person has the propensity to be an asshole. 
It's whether or not the people around the said asshole puts up with it. We are but human, and we will push boundaries to see how much we can get away with. You allow us to act like assholes, then we will act like assholes. Essentially, we are all still children. We will push and push and push until someone slaps us on the ass and tells us to behave ourselves or we'll lose something we want. Be it a bedtime story or our spouse.

The sad fact is, is that some lessons can only be learnt by walking away from the offending party. Forgiveness is not always a virtue. If a person cheats in a relationship, you can put them through hell to atone for their mistake, but if you forgive them, the lesson they learn is that you can forgive them for cheating. So it's likely to happen again. 
You walk away and they learn that they will lose the one they're with. 
So many times, relationships end, a few months down the line you see the other party in another relationship being everything you ever wanted them to be. You're left wondering why they couldn't be like that with you. It's because you taught them that lesson. The only thing left to do is to walk up to their new partner and whisper, "you're welcome".

You deserve to be loved and happy. But contrary to popular belief, it comes from yourself. Only you know what makes you happy, and if you really think about it, it's probably not making compromises and arguing about bills. Being single is the only time you're allowed to be selfish; embrace it: You can go on an around the world vacation and not worry that you're spending your children's tuition fund. You can quit your job and not worry that your children will starve. You can pick up sticks and move to an exotic country and not worry that your partner doesn't want to. You're free to go with the wind and do anything you want.

Don't stick in a relationship you're unhappy in. It will only get worse. Don't believe that a relationship is the key to happiness because unless you're in the right one, it's more like a big heavy iron padlock on that door to happiness.

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